Ailing Guest ~

 We buried a sparrow today that came to our terrace in the summer heat to die.

Burial ~

The childen stood at the gravesite and heard them lower the coffin,  but they refused to lean over and look in. Then they broke into tears.

Grief in Our Town ~

Not enough room in the church for all his friends, many stood outside. Lukas was 18 years old, had just acquired his driver's licence. He was driving to the train station to pick up a friend when he lost control . . .

So Early ~

A classmate of my son died today. He was 41.

Accepting ~

I will not be mad at You if there is no life after death.

To Solve Problems ~

Virginia Wolf toyed with the idea of death as a problem solver in her novels. In the end she committed suicide.

I wonder if the saints ever tinkered with the idea of self-imposed death as a way to solve their loving longing for God.

Practice Dying ~

I went back and asked the Old Monk why I should try to practice dying. He said when we die we are in a state in which we have shed everything worldly. Only at that moment are we ready to receive God.

One by One They Pass Away ~

He was 55. They found him yesterday in his room on the floor, dead. We had taught together for over twenty years. His subjects were German, philosophy and religion. Both of us had seminary backgrounds, something in common. He lived alone on a Black Forest hillside. Being together with young students was his life.

Why Ask Why?

It is her birthday today. Twenty-five years old. In the little town of Winnenden, Germany, not far from here, they are burying her. She was a young woman doing her practice teaching when the boy with the pistol came into the classroom and shot her through the head. And killed fifteen others. Then himself.

Flight from New York ~

As the plane taxied on the runway I thought I should be heading west, to Pennsylvania, Ohio and Indiana. But instead I was flying east, to a foreign country. Will that same moment of uncertainty return to me on my deathbed?

Trust ~

Does the pilot who loses control of his aircraft remain calm until it crashes?

Exercise in Dying ~

Lying down at night and falling off to sleep is my exercise for my own death. . . I mean — the letting go that is involved . . . and the trust.

God's Little Wonder

My son, Martin, and his Barbara just had a baby. We sped to them. I held the little fellow in the palm of my hand and fingered his black hair. Overwhelmed by the fresh arrival from heaven.

At the same moment I had to think of my father's head which I held for ten minutes in the palm of my hand until the heat had gone out . . .

Plucked Away ~

My sister Nancy phoned to tell me that her husband, Rick, had died suddenly.
I thought back to our jaunt on a sunny Saturday just six weeks ago in his red convertible when he said: Come on, I'll take you to see your Perry Como. We were both in such high spirits.

Butler, Pennsylvania ~

Stood at gravesites of mother and father. There are no flowers. Just grass. They are alone. Nearby, our obelisk. There is room for me and my family. The question arises: Here? Or there?

Lancaster, Pennsylvania ~

I walked out before breakfast into a bursting rising sun. Walked along the edge of a cornfield and thought the whole time about the young 24-25 year olds, young lovers, who went into battle here in the Civil War, and had to die in these fields. I thought that after having had to experience the horrible spiritual death of being wrenched apart from the girl they loved, they must have faced their bodily death in the enemy's fire, willingly.

Blacksburg, Virginia ~

Virginia Tech University

Shooting on campus. 32 dead, 21 wounded.

The locals said the winds rose to carry the angels down so they could take the children home.

Is There Any Consolation? ~

In the vinyards along the Rhein near here a 13 year old girl was abducted on her way home from school and murdered. No clues. And yesterday in Heilbronn, a city known for its ties with the Romantic literary tradition, a 22 year old policewoman was shot in the head and died. No clues. She had just finished her training for the profession she had always dreamed of, had just found boyfriend with whom she had fallen in love.

Burying a Choir Brother ~

We sang in the choir together. Bass. He was ten years younger than I. Had lost his wife three years ago. They were very close.

At the Gravesite ~

We took her to her grave yesterday. She was 94. Spent a life in the service of the church. Her brother was a priest and she forfeited marriage to be at his side lifelong as housekeeper and helper. She played the organ and sang. And she could cook. She lived next door to me and I would visit her. And watch out when she would walk to the nearby post office in ice and snow without a coat.

There weren't many people at the funeral. All her friends had passed on long ago.